Marriage with Young Children
Marriage with young children might look very different than your marriage before kids came along. Children require around-the-clock attention and their demands can be exhausting for parents. It can be difficult to find the time or energy to focus on your marriage when you are dealing with young kids. However, it’s important to make sure that you and your spouse are checking in with each other and keeping your relationship strong. Make some time here and there to prioritize your marriage. Be patient and remember that this stage of life gets easier over time. You might need to re-examine your responsibilities and make sure that you are sharing them equally. And finally, get support if you need it. The years with young children can be tough, but also are incredible as you get to see your partner turn into a great parent.
Finding Time for You
It can be difficult to find time to prioritize your relationship when you’re in a marriage with young children. The kids take up plenty of your energy and time. However, you and your partner need time to re-connect with one another. Alone. Hire a sitter or ask a friend to watch the kids one night every few weeks and go out for a meal. Or put the kids to bed and spend the evening together reconnecting without TV or phones.
Be Patient
It’s also important to be patient when you’re in a marriage with young children. While parenting never gets any easier, the physical exhaustion does lessen over time. Remember that the newborn and toddler years are some of the most tiring. Lean on each other and take turns when possible to give one another a break.
Re-Examine Responsibility
If you’re in a marriage with young children it might also be a good idea to re-examine your responsibilities with one another. Parenting is a lot of physical work, but it’s also a lot of mental work. People don’t often acknowledge the mental load of parenting, but it can be truly overwhelming. Somebody has to decide which car seats to buy, make sure the kids have the right size clothes, schedule doctors appointments, and keep track of activities. Make sure that you both are sharing the mental load, physical act of parenting, and household duties.
Get Support
Finally, get support if you are in a marriage with young children. Those toddler years can be draining emotionally. Reach out and talk to a therapist if you are feeling overwhelmed by the stress. It’s also a great idea to speak to a marriage counselor during this time to make sure that you and your spouse are supporting one another. Communicate openly and check in frequently to make sure that you are both handling the stresses of new parenting.
Being in a marriage with young children can be very rewarding. The young years are tough and the days are long. But getting to watch your children grow into tiny humans is amazing to see. Just make sure that you’re giving your marriage some attention throughout these trying years so that you can come out on the other side stronger than ever. Make some time in your schedule for alone time with your spouse. Be patient and remember that these years are some of the toughest. Make sure that you and your spouse are equally sharing in the parenting, mental load, and household duties. And finally, get outside support if you are struggling with stress. The baby and toddler years are some of the most exhausting, but some of the most fun as well, and communicating with your partner throughout can help strengthen your marriage during this stage.